I recently read Caroline Dooner’s new book, The F*ck It Diet: Eating Should Be Easy, and I loved it. I was pretty confident that I would like it because I have listened to Caroline’s podcast for a few years and knew that I agreed with her overall message.
Still, I was a bit nervous. Although I love Caroline’s podcast, her podcast style, which she describes as “exceedingly casual,” isn’t my absolute favorite. (Note: I do like that she fully embraces her verbose style.) Listening to someone rambling is one thing, but reading it is much worse. Alas, if you feel the same way, rest assured; her book is thoughtful and organized. It is a quick, easy, page-turning read.
The other reason I was nervous was that I knew that she did not write the book for me. Her intended audience includes people who feel out-of-control and binge on food, which she eloquently explains is a response to deprivation. Thus, a message that flows throughout the book is that you will eventually stop binging after you stop mentally and physically restricting food. I, however, have the unique genetic mutations of anorexia; I don’t binge in response to deprivation. Thus, I wanted to learn how to stop controlling my eating, not learn to accept that I have no control, which is what most readers need to learn. Despite having an experience that is different than that of the author and her intended audience, the book was helpful. I believe this book will help countless people stop restricting and make peace with food, whether or not the reader’s motive is to reduce binging behaviors.
As someone in recovery from anorexia, not the diet and binge cycle, one of the two messages that I find most helpful in this book is this: I need to accept myself at a higher weight. Over the past several years, I have done a lot of work to dismantle the fatphobia diet culture taught me and genuinely find beauty and value in other people of all sizes and shapes. Despite this, I still struggle with the idea of loving and respecting my own body at a higher weight. I need to untangle my worthiness from my weight. I need to accept that even though my disease allows me to suppress my weight, I must give up that control to recover fully. I need to face my fear of being abandoned and unlovable in a larger body. Therefore, I am intentionally gaining weight right now.
The other significant message I am taking away from Caroline’s book is this: When I get a craving for food or an urge to eat, I should honor it. I should honor it even if I don’t think I should be hungry — even if there is a food that diet culture considers “healthier” available. Whenever I am hungry, I should eat. Even if I am not hungry, I am allowed to eat. I can pick foods that look delicious. There should be no shame, restrictions, or rules around eating.
I believe that after I learn to accept myself at a higher weight and surrender to intuitive eating, my weight will settle within my set point range, and my appetite will stabilize and be less distracting. My body will land at whatever size it needs to be to support my physical, mental, and emotional well-being the best it can. Only by accepting weight gain and eating with full permission will I be able to heal my relationships with food and my body entirely.
In conclusion, I highly recommend Caroline Dooner’s book, The F*ck It Diet. You can buy the book on Amazon, and you can find Caroline on Instagram or her podcast.
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